Party food and failure/setback #1

I have a close friend who lives in Washington and she has been visiting family in town this past week. Her visit happened to coincide with her daughter's first birthday so today there was a get together to celebrate. I'm sad to report that I ate like the fat girl that I am and not the thin girl I want to be. I indulged in chips, dip, queso and cheese and now I am sorry I did. I hate to admit it but I feel uneasy and a bit self conscious in certain social situations because of my weight. I put on a good front and am quite convincing at acting like I'm at ease but I'm not. I think I ate today because it comforted me. Of course, I don't feel very comforted at this moment. I feel bloated and sorry and mad at myself. Damn it! I probably undid a week of good work in a few hours. The lesson I need to take from this is that it didn't really make me feel better at the party and it certainly didn't make me feel comforted afterwards so next time I need to actually listen to my inner voice which was telling me I didn't really want to eat all that crap. Sigh.

Fell off wagon but I'm hoisting myself back on,

Fat Girl

P.S. I also just ate a candy bar which didn't help matters. It's all gone and there isn't anything else in the house so I think I'm safe for the rest of the night!